Sunday, January 24, 2010
~~ See!!! English is so important! ~~
~~ See!!! English is so important! ~~
WHY LADIES MUST KNOW HOW TO SPEAK ENGLISH
One day, an Ang Moh from USA arrived at KLIA Airport.
After he checked out from the customs, he felt he needed to go to the toilet, so he looked for one. When he found the toilet, there was a lady sitting at the entrance.
When he was about to enter the toilet, the lady stopped him and asked for forty cents in Cantonese ('sey (see kok').
The Mat Salleh wondered why in MALAYSIA they have to 'see the cock' before entering the toilet?
So he said 'no' but the lady insisted. Since he had no choice, he took out his cock and showed it to her.
The lady said 'No! No! Duit, Duit!' (money in Malay), but the Ang Moh misunderstood again and thought that she said 'Do it! Do it!' So he asked, 'Now? Here?'
The lady replied 'Yes, yes!' because she doesn't quite
understand English.
understand English.
The Ang Moh thought that she wanted to have sex with him, so he stripped the lady and made love to her.
The lady started screaming and shouted, 'SAKIT! SAKIT!'
(pain in Malay), and the Ang Moh thought it was 'SUCK IT! SUCK IT!'
(pain in Malay), and the Ang Moh thought it was 'SUCK IT! SUCK IT!'
He said 'OK! I will suck it for you' and took both breasts and suck them. The lady again screamed 'Oh, TUHAN!' (Oh, MY GOD....in Malay).
The Ang Moh misunderstood again.
'Too HARD? OK, sweetheart, I'll be gentler a bit,' the Ang Moh replied.
Suddenly, a security guard walked by, so the lady shouted
for help, 'TOLONG! TOLONG, ENCIK!'
for help, 'TOLONG! TOLONG, ENCIK!'
The Ang Moh replied, 'Not too long, just 6 inches only.'
Precious you
8:30 PM |
~~ 永远不要放弃你所爱的人! ~~
在日本发生了一件千真万确的事:有人为了装修家里,拆开了墙;日式住宅的墙壁通 常是中间架了木板后,两边批上泥土,其实里面是空的。他拆墙壁的时候,发现一只 壁虎被困在那里一根从外面钉进来的钉子钉住了那只壁虎的尾巴。那人见状,既觉可 怜又感好奇,他仔细看了看那根钉子,天啊!那根钉子是十年前盖那房子的时候钉的。 &nbs p; 到底怎么回事?那只壁虎竟然困在墙壁里活了整整十年!黑暗中的墙壁里的十年,真 不简单。不对呀?他继而寻思,尾巴被钉住了,一个步子也跨不出的这只壁虎,到底 靠什么撑过了这十年?他于是暂时停止了装修工程看看它到底吃了什么!他要一探究 竟。过了不久,不知从哪里又钻出来一只壁虎,嘴里含着食物...啊!他一时愣住了, 这是什么样的情形啊?为了被钉住尾巴而不能走动的壁虎,另一只壁虎竟然在十年的岁 月里一直不停地衔取食物喂它。我听了以后,很感动,真的也不去想它们之间的关系:
Precious you
8:28 PM |
~~ Always tell your mother '' I love You!'' ~~
My mom only had one eye. I hated her...
She was such an embarrassment. .
She cooked for students & teachers to support the family. There was this one day during elementary school where my mom came to Say hello to me. I was so embarrassed. How could she do this to me? I ignored her, threw her a hateful look and ran out.
The next day at school one of my classmates said, 'EEEE, your mom onlyHas one eye!' I wanted to bury myself. I also wanted my mom to just disappear..
I confronted her that day and said, ' If you're only gonna make me aLaughing stock, why don't you just die?' My mom did not respond.... I didn't even stop to think for a second about what I had said, because I was full of anger.I was oblivious to her feelings.I wanted out of that house, and have nothing to do with her.
So I studied real hard, got a chance to go abroad to study. Then, I got married. I bought a house of my own. I had kids of my own. I was happy with my life, my kids and the comforts, Then one day, myMother came to visit me. She hadn't seen me in years and she didn't even meet herGrandchildren.
When she stood by the door, my children laughed at her, and I yelled at Her for coming over uninvited.I screamed at her, 'How dare you come to my house and scare myChildren! 'GET OUT OF HERE! NOW!!!' And to this, my mother quietly answered, 'Oh, I'm so sorry. I may have Gotten the wrong address,'
And she disappeared out of sight.One day, a letter regarding a school reunion came to my house. So I lied to my wife that I was going on a business trip.After the reunion, I went to the old shack just out of curiosity.
My neighbors said that she died.
I did not shed a single tear.
They handed me a letter that she had wanted me to have.
'My dearest son,
I think of you all the time.
I'm sorry that I came to your house and Scared your children.
I was so glad when I heard you were coming for the reunion.
But I may not be able to even get out of bed to see you.
I'm sorry that I was a constant embarrassment to you when you were Growing up.
You see........when you were very little, you got into an accident, andLost your eye.
As a mother, I couldn't stand watching youHaving to grow up with one eye.
So I gave you mine.
I was so proud of my son who was seeing a whole new world for me, in myPlace, with that eye.
With all my love to you,Your mother.
She was such an embarrassment. .
She cooked for students & teachers to support the family. There was this one day during elementary school where my mom came to Say hello to me. I was so embarrassed. How could she do this to me? I ignored her, threw her a hateful look and ran out.
The next day at school one of my classmates said, 'EEEE, your mom onlyHas one eye!' I wanted to bury myself. I also wanted my mom to just disappear..
I confronted her that day and said, ' If you're only gonna make me aLaughing stock, why don't you just die?' My mom did not respond.... I didn't even stop to think for a second about what I had said, because I was full of anger.I was oblivious to her feelings.I wanted out of that house, and have nothing to do with her.
So I studied real hard, got a chance to go abroad to study. Then, I got married. I bought a house of my own. I had kids of my own. I was happy with my life, my kids and the comforts, Then one day, myMother came to visit me. She hadn't seen me in years and she didn't even meet herGrandchildren.
When she stood by the door, my children laughed at her, and I yelled at Her for coming over uninvited.I screamed at her, 'How dare you come to my house and scare myChildren! 'GET OUT OF HERE! NOW!!!' And to this, my mother quietly answered, 'Oh, I'm so sorry. I may have Gotten the wrong address,'
And she disappeared out of sight.One day, a letter regarding a school reunion came to my house. So I lied to my wife that I was going on a business trip.After the reunion, I went to the old shack just out of curiosity.
My neighbors said that she died.
I did not shed a single tear.
They handed me a letter that she had wanted me to have.
'My dearest son,
I think of you all the time.
I'm sorry that I came to your house and Scared your children.
I was so glad when I heard you were coming for the reunion.
But I may not be able to even get out of bed to see you.
I'm sorry that I was a constant embarrassment to you when you were Growing up.
You see........when you were very little, you got into an accident, andLost your eye.
As a mother, I couldn't stand watching youHaving to grow up with one eye.
So I gave you mine.
I was so proud of my son who was seeing a whole new world for me, in myPlace, with that eye.
With all my love to you,Your mother.
Precious you
8:22 PM |
~~ New Robbery Method in Ladies Restroom ~~
Ladies...please take care!
New theft technique. Just received this
latest theft technique used by robbers.
It seems feasible so take heed.
Warning to all the ladies out there;
and men please inform your significant other.
(And, hey, it could happen to the guys!)
The Latest Scam:
Robbing Females using the
restroom/'ladies'/bathroom
at a Shopping Mall... ...
The way the scam works,
a man slips into a women's rest room
and sneaks into a unit.
He waits until there is only one woman
in the restroom in a neighbouring unit/stall.
The criminal then stands on the toilet seat
and points a hand gun into the next unit/stall,
demanding the woman's valuables.
After getting her cash and jewellery,
he demands that she removes all of her clothing
and kicks them out of the unit/stall.
The thief tosses the clothing into a shopping bag,
hangs an 'out of order sign' on the restroom door outside,
and slips back into the mall.
The 'out of order sign' ensures no one
will soon come to the woman's rescue.
It usually takes an hour or two for
the woman to work up the nerve to leave
the rest room in the nude,
giving the criminal ample time to make his get away.
The woman is left naked humiliated in a mall full of strangers.
The best defence, says police, is to never go into a shopping mall restroom alone, as only women who are by themselves are targeted.
This has so far been a nearly perfect crime, as none of the perpetrators have been caught. Don't let this happen to another woman.
Precious you
8:07 PM |
Sunday, January 10, 2010
Precious you
6:36 AM |
Precious you
6:22 AM |
~~ Christmas 游街 ~~12.12.09
Precious you
6:16 AM |
~~ Parkson Fitting Room ~~
Precious you
6:10 AM |
~~ Kidnergaten kids ~~ Dec 2009 ~~
Precious you
6:03 AM |
~~ Brother's puppies, KIKI ~~
Precious you
5:55 AM |
~~ Wang Wang ~~
Precious you
5:50 AM |
~~ Mummy's Birthday 2009 ~~
Precious you
5:36 AM |
~~ 喜来登restaurant ~~
Precious you
5:04 AM |